We Have to Clear the Child First Ma'am


I believe it has finally happened. Our airport security has reached the height of ridiculousness and I feel it is my patriotic duty to report this incident. So proceed at your own risk (of outrage or at least laughter). While reading this story, please keep in mind that the Bangor airport has 3 gates total, that's right. Not 3 terminals, 3 gates. It's so small I could spit from one end to the other and it would land outside. But I digress...

Yesterday, I was traveling from Bangor, ME to Minneapolis, MN with my 19 month old son. He was wearing pajamas, it being 5:30 in the morning and all, I figured I would cut him a break. As I get through security with my stroller, back pack, and baby bag I pass neatly through, no alarms, no illegal liquids, metal instruments of nail grooming, or lighters.

However, I'm told by the staff that I have been "chosen" by the airline for extra security check. I mention that's fine, I mean, they didn't set up the extra check, right...? I tell them my son can stand next to me and he'll be fine. Well apparently that's not good enough for the TSA, no not at all!

No, we have got to secure our airlines, leaving no stone unturned, no possible terrorist in the making above scrutiny. That is when I learn the best part about the screening. Not only must they wand and pat me down, but they must also wand and pat down my 19 month old in pajamas. Apparently this is standard procedure.

A bit miffed I admit, but I calmly allow them to pat down my little man from head to toe without objection. Because really, what would that do except make it more unpleasant for all of us? Oh but yes, in the back of my mind I immediately thought of my blog and what I would soon be posting there. The best part, I get through security, and there is a guy sitting with a travel coffee mug, way over 3 ounces and supposedly banned by the TSA (and there was no store inside the secure area). I guess he had special clearance for his morning cup of joe.

Strike another point for the war on terror! Toddlers from the Midwest prevented from exercising their suicidal bombing tendencies! America is safe!
5